my decorations are irritated

The first 12 years of my life were lived with a perfectly square, plastic or metal encased, brown wood grain colored tv with a rounded gray screen (if my memory serves me correctly.) We would watch Perry Mason, Hawaii 5-O and listen to Paul Harvey while eating macaroni and cheese and drinking milk. The picture was static gray and white - much resembling Pennie's fur now that I think about it.

I think the VCR was introduced when we moved to my parent's current residence. We had one channel - 12 - and Home Improvement was our re-run. For some reason Perry Mason didn't play there, but we would sometimes watch movies on the weekends. I remember that TV being black and having a remote. Brett threw it at me once, but I dodged and it hit the tv screen. Pretty solid thing; didn't phase it.

In college I inherited a 214 pound tv like my original one (only there was twice as much tv box as screen and it was oblong) from a graduating student. I should have perceived the relief on his face better - I thought it was due to his finishing school. We used this to watch the news in the mornings when the reception was favorable.

Once married my tv situation changed slightly. We had a more recent model and the rim around the screen was a smaller percentage of its overall size. We could fit a large radio with speakers, stacks of CDs and DVDs, cords, cables, remotes, video game systems and that TV in our entertainment center. Still, seeing no need for cable, we had few channels and little need to turn it on. In fact, one night, studying for some of my classes, David experimented watching American Idol. We haven't seen that show since that night almost 7 years ago. I think he may be afraid of it.

THEN, a few years ago David won a 40 inch flat screen TV the likes of which we never imagined in our home. It actually filled up our entertainment center. Still, we resisted applying for cable. For four years now we've watched Seinfeld and the occasional news broadcast on our glorious tv...in static...with bunny ears. We are fine with this. We are even fine with the scoffing of our friends who shake their heads at the shameful waste of such a tv minus cable. And I had come to terms with the bunny ears all askew on our mantle.

But the countdown has begun. Soon, all tv will be digital or nothing. And yet we've avoided the necessary black box. When contemplating what to do we just shrugged our shoulders. And then Ben came to visit. He insisted that we must already have digital capability, but we'd gone over that and we didn't...or so we thought. With a few twists of a dial and scans of the controller he produced a perfectly clear channel 11 (with the potential for more!) WHAT?!

The problem is this: the digitalness still requires an antenna. And that antenna is sitting ON my vase.